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Today we'll talk about love. Not the sexual love, you pervert. The simple love that exists in the best things in life, in the small things, small sweet gestures that make us beam. Love is that sort of thing. We feel it at some point or another. And it starts funny like this. Breathing fast, heart beating fast, butterflies in your tummy, dry mouth, mental confusion. NO, this is not a panic attack, even though it may happen to some, yours truly included. There was this boy and I always stammered and became a total idiot when I tried to speak to him. Oh how many times I had a little drink to loosen up and be able to quit stammering like an old Long Play with a bad track. I may be the only person who is capable to type stammering. Yes, feels like symptoms of some attack, and yet everybody wants. At a level or another. Company, or lust... The Love of the moment, the love of those heavenly blue eyes, the love for the sky itself, when it kisses the ocean.
And everybody knows the three pains love brings, that hurt more than five surgery recoveries - self experience. When you experience one of these pains you never forget. I experienced all of them, and I do not wish so for anyone. The first happens when the love target is not there. This one is called pain of longing. You want a love madly, badly, even knowing that it brings the risk of the other two, even knowing it can maybe last but a day. You chase, you seek, you pray for any God of your choice and belief, you read books of self-help, you enroll in cuisine classes, anything goes really; but the world outside is full of couples. It seems everyone but you have someone to hold, and rather than chase... you hide. Loneliness and longing are painful... sharp pain, like needles poking in every nerve. The second, the pain of Rejection. You have this badly resolved crush on someone, with all the symptoms said above, for that specific person that doesn't want you. You beg, you crawl, and it doesn't happen. You stalk and send flowers and they call the cops, the coastguards and the marines on you. Terrible... but while you conform to some level - at least you have someone to love - you don't have that person in your arms, to kiss and to hold, to touch and to talk. Painful... you always think you are not good enough. This is a sore, sore pain, as if someone had stabbed your heart, and kept swaying the dagger. The third is the pain of a break-up. When the one you want the most, burn for, desire, love even during illness or morning breath, the one you spend (or invest?) Time and money and feelings, when you gave up half of yourself to make them whole... and suddenly they tell you it is over. This pain is such as if someone was yanking your heart out of your chest. And as such, it means it cannot be even described as such. Why we all want love however? If it brings jealousy, insecurity, possessiveness, a total life change and the risk of at least one of the pains above? Because it is typical of the human nature to measure life by the amount of bad, forgetting the intensity of the good. And the good is good, comfortable; the bad is bothersome, even if it is as natural as the good things. If we have money, we do not need to worry about food tomorrow; if we don't have it bothers us not to know if we can eat. The truth is that, with all the risks and fears, love is plenty; it is food for eyes, heart and soul. people in love heal faster, smell better, have more self-esteem, more self-care, dress better, behave in a more amusing and relaxed manner, look far more beautiful and bright like the sun. They know the joy of share, the strength of support, the beauty of understanding, the pleasure to please. When the other does something silly, like giving you a rose, it means the world. Little things count... and you love to value every one of them. It seems simple but it isn't. The attack symptoms can last for a long time and every time you see that person, even if everyday, the butterflies will travel from your tummy to your heart with the speed of light. Valentines day, is everyday, because it is a celebration of love. But the best part is, don't go spend all that money in a gift... Choose a romantic place and visit with your lover, or even alone, to long and to dream, because... Love is still free, and it is right here... like a bird. As long as you have the seed of love in your hand, and stop moving... your Lovebird will come. Happy Valentines, Cezare Blanco
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